The most convicting thing I've read all week:
...the first characteristic of grace-based homes is: They are homes that give children the freedom to be different. It is not a grace-based home when parents allow their children to be free but then punish them for being different. If you have a different child and remind her about the sacrifice you've made to accommodate her quirks, it is not a context of grace...
Grace Based Parenting, by Dr. Tim Kimmel (p. 141)