Last week I unveiled my One Word for 2015 - submit - and the three things I want to focus on this year:
- Submit my work and to a writing lifestyle
- Submit to the Spirit
- Submit in our marriage
The very first thought that popped into my head was: submit my work. I want to be writing more, with intention, thought and research, and I should be submitting it. The next step in a writing lifestyle for me is that I begin to treat my hobby as my (highly flexible, part-time, with a kid on my lap and a jug of milk on my desk) job.
Next on the submission ladder is of a spiritual nature. I want to submit to the Spirit of God within me. I know He's in there chatting away and I barely listen to Him, let alone do what He says. I mean yes, I love Jesus and worship is one of my love languages and our family life is a life on mission, but often I'm just a hearer of the word and not necessarily a doer of it.
The retreat I went on last year was the first step in stopping - literally - and waiting for God to speak. I need to do more of that. I actually really want to do it. Which can only be a sign of my first submit success. Except, you know, now I actually have to follow through on it.
Related: I was studying some Scripture in relation to submitting and as my hand furiously scribbled notes and passages to contemplate (Colossians 3, if you must know... what a killer of a chapter), I couldn't help but think: "I look forward to failing spectacularly at this."
But alas, I also look forward to trying it.
Finally, and yes, here it comes. I want to spend some time submitting in my relationships. Not all, mind you, but I do need to practice listening and joining with Matt in how God is leading us. Matt and I practice Equally Shared Parenting and in the last few years we would describe our marriage as mutually submissive as we submit to Christ as our head (obtuse religious terms I know, but stay with me).
We both take on the mantle of spiritual leadership from time to time. He has a more prophetic bent, while I can be more discerning. He is practical in his spirituality while I am more lyrical. It works well for us and we've yet to be at significant odds (give or take a few weeks of prayer). But while I'm mostly at home doing my (fun, pajama-clad) part-time job of writing and my other (messy, burning meals) job of motherhood, I want to consider our family life and ways Jesus - as the head of our home, our marriage and family - might be asking me to submit to the most important people in my life.
Last year turned out to be a Year of No, and in many ways, it was good and right and exactly what I needed to recalibrate spiritually and emotionally. But as I think about 2015 and what it could mean for my work, my spirit and our marriage, I sense a Year of Yes. A Year of Do the Work, already, Karen. Or maybe a Year of I'm Listening, Waiting and Following.
Do you see why submit makes me twitchy?